Dear Millennials: It’s Okay If It Isn’t All About You

Posted on: Feb 20, 2014

Categories: Millennial Perspective, Relationships and Family

millennialsIt’s okay to care about other people while you’re in your twenties.

It’s even okay to get married.

This is Caroline again, Curtis’ millennial marketing assistant, and I wanted to give you a looking into one millennial’s perspective of early-twenty-something relationships.

According to current trends, millennials aren’t getting married until the age of 27 for women and 29 for men. Rather than getting married in their early to mid-twenties, many millennials are waiting until a bit later — until a post-college debt, post-graduate school, post-figuring-out-career time of life.

The idea behind this is pretty simple: use your twenties to iron out any kinks in your finances, your personality, and your life goals before settling down for “real life.” Rather than getting married, the twenty-somethings are using this time of life to figure out who they want to be, how to pay off school, and how they want to spend the rest of their lives.

This month, Curtis has been focusing on the concept of casting your show. And while you are the star of your show, it is equally important to have excellent supporting characters and a co-star. In order to make your show the best it can be, you have to be willing to share the stage.

While there are millions of reasons and articles and arguments out there for not getting into a serious relationship in your twenties, there are also a lot of good reasons to find your co-star early.

Here are a few things for Millennials to consider:

  • You’ll be motivated to pay off your college debt faster. If you’re not saving for a house or being held accountable by anyone else, it’s a lot more tempting to just go ahead and spend all ten years paying back your college loans. For example: this young woman managed to pay off $90,000 of debt in three years.

  • You’ll be happier. According to Knot Yet, “Twentysomethings who are unmarried, especially singles, are significantly more likely to drink to excess, to be depressed, and to report lower levels of satisfaction with their lives, compared to married twentysomethings.”

  • You’ll have a stable work life sooner. If you aren’t planning on getting married until you’re 30, then you’ve got almost a decade to “focusing on your career” to land the “dream job.” If you’re planning on settling down and needing to be financially stable sooner, then you need to get a job now. You’ll work harder for the things you want if you have someone beside you, motivating you to achieve your goals.

  • You’ll have better pickings. Think about it this way: if you’re graduating high school surrounded by some incredible, driven, good-looking people, and some not quite as attractive or as intelligent people, who do you think is going to get snapped up first? If you’re one of the first people in your peer group to get into a serious relationship, then you’ve got the best options still available.

Ultimately, if you find the right co-star, your show will be improved. It doesn’t matter if you find this person at the age of 20 or 30 or 40, just so long as they’re the right person. But whatever you do, don’t wait to bring that co-star up on stage with you just because current trends say you’re “too young.”

(And FYI: That picture up there is of my husband at I at 21. I’d say we’re pretty happy.)

 How young do you think is too young? Comment and tell me your opinion!